Monday, May 18, 2009

Got Cheesus?

Wow, so much has happened since we last spoke - Swine flu is down while child witches are up, pirates are out and Cheesus is in and oh yeah, THE RANGERS ARE IN FIRST PLACE!! What the hell ya'll?

This is no joke folks. A Dallas couple - holla! - found sudden fame when they found a Cheeto that they said STRONGLY RESEMBLES JESUS CHRIST DEEP IN PRAYER! What I want to know is a) seriously? and b) who takes the time to look at their Cheeto's before stuffing them into their mouth!?


Before you panic, get the facts straight and click here for all things swine and flu Q&A. Admittedly this info would have been more useful weeks ago but it's never too late folks. Altho this trendy flu is no longer front page news, it is still out there! Experts (and there are lots of 'em) say that the flu may be going into a 'hibernation' of sorts BUT has the potential to come back stronger and badder than EVER in the fall! Fun fact? This isn't the first time that this flu has hit.

They just don't make pirates like they used to. No longer are we free to celebrate the Captain Jack Sparrows and Will Turners (sigh) that Hollywood totes and even celebrating 'Talk Like a Pirate Day' has become questionable and possibly un-PC - ARG! Somali pirates are on the rise and raked in over 30 million dollars alone last year but still, you hafta admit, whenever you see/hear/read the headline 'Pirates Attack', you chuckle - a little, and think wha? Right?

CNN (see, with interesting stories like this I haven't quit you yet)
sadly reported recently that the issue of "child witches" is soaring in Nigeria and other parts of the world. Children accused of witchcraft are often incarcerated in churches for weeks on end and beaten, starved and tortured in order to extract a confession. In case you're wondering, you can tell when a child or teenager has been possessed because they are a) rambunctious, b) skip school, and c) cry when you beat them with brooms because you see, (Nigerian) witches are terrified of brooms.

Ok, yes, it's only (the end of) May, but that will not stop me from being totally stoked about our dear little Rangers' 6 game winning streak (which came to an end today - damn Tigers) but still leaves them in a solid first place standing in the AL West AND, dare I say, a solid second place in the AL overall. Woot y'all, woot. And what might you ask has finally changed? Two words: pitching and defense. Oh, and someone named Nolan, Ryan that is.

That's all I got for now boys and girls. Thanks for your patience. An overview of Lost S5 is on the way... Just as soon as I watch the finale.

Cau for now.