Yes, I know and apparently sometimes forget that Special K will also be there to show our son - our son - the ins and outs of being a boy, a male in this world. Of the hygiene and the angst - do boys even have angst? Surely they must. Will I like his girlfriends? Will I be nice to them and warm? Or will I be nice with just enough coldness to let them know I know what they're up to. That I've got my eye on them with one eyebrow raised. In hindsight I forgive and empathize with the moms of my past boyfriends who, I felt, never really liked me or trusted me with their sons. I get it now and my son is not even out of my womb. Yes, these are the things I think about.
I'm not old but I'm older than I thought I'd be when I started bringing little people of our own into the universe. Not for lack of trying, just a different timeline and I'm OK with that. I think. I But I do worry. I worry that I may not have the energy necessary for a boy. Will I be able to keep up? Will I still be fun practicing soccer drills and going to the park and running around and climbing trees? Will I be expected to climb trees? What will that look like? These are the things I think about. We'll figure it out, of course we will.
I never imagined myself with a son, but I'm starting to. And as much as it scares the shit out of me, it excites me just the same. Boy oh boy we are in for it.